


certainly not

by joji_is_trash



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Good Deceit, M/M, Post SvS, Sympathetic Deceit, blood mention, but deceit loves him, long descriptions but mainly conversations and inner dialouge, morally gray remus, morally grey remus, no actual blood description though, remus is a lil shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 09:31:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19742911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joji_is_trash/pseuds/joji_is_trash
Summary: Deceit is upset after the trail of selfishness vs selflessness is over, and Remus is there to comfort (and annoy) him.





	certainly not

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first sanders sides fic. criticism is always welcome!

“They just don’t understand, Rem,” Deceit sighed into the hands covering his face as he sat (read: laid down pitifully, like the sad snake he was) on Remus’ bed. He had just escaped from Thomas’ new video, svs.

“Oh, don’t act so surprised! When would they ever? Hah!” Remus, who had a habit of always calling himself the Duke when introduced to new people, an unrelated topic, really, laid himself across the two-faced side’s lap. Deceit visibly appeared to be disgusted with the act, but was preening on the inside. Physical affection was not a common occurrence in the dark dredges of The Host’s mind.

“And calm down before you burst a vein. Actually, maybe don’t. I’ve always wanted to see that kinda thing happen up close,” he took a quick, pointless breath. “Though, it would be a pity to have to clean up blood from the carpet, if it somehow exploded your head. Or not. I’d probably just let the blood soak in, give the room a nice, iron-y smell–”

“Remus, please, be quiet. Your incessant rambling will totally explode my head before a burst vein will,” the snake groaned, pressing his hands now on his forehead, massaging his temples in a dramatic manner. Rem, on the other hand, squirmed around (almost in a snake-like manner, if one were to describe it) on Deceit’s lap until he found a comfortable sitting position with his legs straddling the latter’s waist.

“You know that’s not possible!” He fake pouted at Deceit. “The being quite part, at least. I’m not so sure about the head explode-y thing.” A fake gasp was then heard. “We should try that out! But, again, just the exploding brains. Shutting my mouth is a task not easily accomplished, heh!”

“If I kiss you, will you shut up for just a few hours? It’s not like I’m desperate for sleep or anything,” the side grumbled. Remus nodded, not speaking, as if showing that he could, in fact, be silent for a given amount of time. So, Deceit sat up a closed the gap between their lips. 

Remus, if Deceit were to be honest, didn’t taste that bad, given his reputation as a stinky trash man. He tasted more like disgustingly over-sweetened coffee, burnt almound milk, and, unsurprisingly, what Deceit imagined dirty socks were like. 

Remus’ tongue slipped in, as always happened, knowing it would disconcert Deceit (more-so make him upset that he had a forked snake tongue, unlike any other in the sanders residence) The rat bastard found it funny, though, and Deceit couldn’t help but relish at the expression on any given person (specifically Remus) when they received what they had truly wanted, so *Deceit allowed it. 

*Though, however, keep in mind that Deceit would get back at Remus for that kind of thing later, in the future, when he felt more mischievous than sleep-deprived and generally distraught. 

“When you wake up, I’ll let you rant to me about what happened. But I know you need your sleep, snakey!~” Remus smirked after pulling back from an agitated, albeit now flustered Deceit. 

“Sure,” Deceit mumbled, falling back onto the bed with already closing eyes. Deceit, truthfully, was grateful that Remus would listen to him. He would never, ever, in the rest of his eternity (and after that, too), admit the small fact.

So, believe me when I tell you that Deceit really did try his best not to smile when Remus covered him with a comfy, heavy-weighted blanket. And, let me absolutely assure you on this, he most obviously did not curl into the warmth of the repulsive side when Remus snuggled him. Certainly not. And Remus undoubtedly did not, under any circumstances, place a gentle kiss onto the back of Dee’s neck.


End file.
